summer, beaches, and mayo clinics.

School is finally over with. I took my EOC and made a 94. Thank God. I'm so glad. So my summer is off to a pretty good start. I worked Tuesday though. Wednesday I finally got to see Cody. We went to Chili's for his birthday, and then got ice cream, and then went to the movies. After all of that we walked around downtown Hickory at night and took some pictures together. They were so cute. :)

Thursday morning me and mom headed out for Florida. She had to come here to go to the Mayo Clinic for her knee. So we made a weekend trip out of it. After our 7 hour drive, and getting lost because the GPS took us to the wrong address, we had some amazing seafood at Slyder's. I got Dungeness Crab legs, shrimp, a crab roll, and seafood gumbo. Oh my gosh, it was soooo good. I haven't anything besides frozen seafood from Ingles in over a year. We got these MONSTER sundaes at a little ice cream shop on the corner called Lee's. It was really good. I got a Reese's cup sundae. They were a little pricey, but in my opinion they were worth it.

After our little adventure near the beach, we tried to find a Wal*Mart, well the GPS took us to where the old Wal*Mart used to be, because it is still in the system. So we made a huge circe for nothing.

Today we are at the Mayo Clinic. We woke up at 6am, ate our complimentary breakfast of cheese danishes and apple juice at the hotel, and drove the Clinic. Mom went back to get stuff done, and I'm in the waiting room, counting down the minutes until we hit the beach and I can get my tan on. ;)

Hey God,

It's been a while since we talked. And I'm hoping that maybe if I blog some of our conversations that I will keep up with it more often than usual.
I'm so thankful for everything You've done for me, given me, and helped me through. I'm thankful for my family, I don't know where I would be without them. I'm thankful for Cody, he's helped me with so much and I know You put him in my life for a reason. I'm thankful for all the friends I have/had.
Everything hasn't been going as great as I'd like it to. And I'm pretty sure the main reason is my lack of communication with everyone, especially You. I know that's something I need to change. With You, and with Cody if I want things to get better. Its so hard for me to talk about how I feel though. I absolutely hate it. I would rather push everything behind and forget about it. I need you to help me with that.
I know You forgive me for anything that I've done, if I ask for it. But sometimes I feel like I shouldn't have done something and I don't want to ask because I feel to ashamed of it, even though I know You'll forgive me.
One of the last things I struggle with is grudges. And I know thats something that I can't keep doing. Its hard not to, but I am really trying. I've progressed a little bit, I can actually do certain things and talk to a certain person and give her a hug without getting mad or annoyed now. Which I feel is a big step for me right now, and hopefully I'll be able to progress even more.

Tug of War

The past few posts are from my school blog. I haven't blogged on here and a while. I should really start back. Everything has just been so stressful lately. Things with Cody went from bad to okay to worse. I hope things are getting better.

We haven't been to great lately. Everyone besides my family thinks that I should just let it go, and that after two years the relationship isn't where it should be and its gone downhill, so its going to be hard to get it back to where and was and make it to where it should already be. I feel like its tug of war and my feelings are in the middle. Its a fight between what I want to happen and what is the most logical thing, considering everything that's gone on. Its like a game, pulling back and forth, and dragging me. But I'm sticking it out. I'm going to put in my share of effort and more, and all I can do is hope for the best. If it works, it works. If it doesn't get better then it just wasn't meant to be and I'm not going to regret that I didn't listen to the signs when things started heading downhill. But hopefully it doesnt end up that way.

Work, Pink Bellies, and Sumo Wrestling

I was actually a little excited about going to work yesterday. I was ready to leave school, go home and chill, and then go to work. Well, I got home and played with Brenna, ate some stuffed shells, talked to Cody, and layed in bed. I looked at the clock and it was already 4:00 and I really didnt want to get up and get ready for work. So I drug my feet and got dressed, got in my car and drove to work. When I got there Mandy told me that since the guys took this weekend off to go to Philly for a concert, Mandy, Caitlin, and I are going to go to the beach for a weekend this summer. So I'm excited about that. I can't wait. But anyway, back to my night. Billy got to work at the same time I did. Wayne finally showed up and Caitlin and Mandy left. Billy told me all about prom and how much fun he had, even though his date turned out psycho, and some guy wanted to beat him up. Me and Wayne told Billy he has to ask this girl to go out for lunch with him by thursday or he is gonna do it for him. He is so scared to ask her out. I was texting Cody about going to the beach with Mandy and Caitlin and he said, "do they drink" and Wayne got my phone and said, "I think so", having know clue what the conversation was about. So Cody got mad and said that I better not drink, and Wayne told him I wouldn't drink, much. haha. Cody got so pissed and I finally told him that Wayne was kidding and that Mandy definately does not drink. Me and Wayne beat eachother up all night. I left a hand print on his belly. After a long, abusive night of work we finally got to leave at 10. We walked outside and I realized that I left my phone and debit card in the back room. So Wayne had to unlock it for me, and when I got back out we had a sumo match in the parking lot. I took him down, and then he pushed me and took my shoe. He got in his car and locked the doors and started backing up so I jumped on the hood and he drove over to my car with me still on the hood. His car was so dirty, Billy and me drew all over it. Then Wayne moved and I tried to get in his car, but he attacked me. So I got in my car and drove home.